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More Money, More Stuff, or More Friends? What Really Matters the Most in Life?


In the past two months this summer (July and August) there have been two lottery jackpots each eclipsing $1B in pre-tax payout. The Powerball lottery had one winner in California for $1B and the Mega Millions lottery produced an even luckier winner in Florida for a $1.6B prize.


While I don't play the lottery, the sheer size of these payouts to a single winner got me thinking. How will the winners' lives be changed in an instant by money, and if that change will be for the better or worse?


Is money the answer to our problems or, as some would say, is money the root of all evil?


Before I venture any further, I need to share that I view these two questions from a fortunate vantage point. I am retired, and I don't live paycheck to paycheck. In other words, I am financially secure. Therefore, I take it as a given that if I needed money for day-to-day survival, my views on money and what matters most in life would likely be different.


So with that stake in the ground, I return to my base question about whether money and accumulating lots of "stuff" can actually buy you happiness.


If you had asked me that question at the start of my career, I would have answered in the affirmative, i.e. that more money had a direct and positive correlation with more happiness.


Working in sales, it was all about the size of the commission check. I can still remember my first "significant" commission check and how that single check paid off all of my graduate school loans. That was happiness (or perhaps relief).


As my career progressed, the focus expanded from more money to more stuff. A bigger house, the latest electronics, keeping up appearances with peers and neighbors. But I am not sure that as my finances and material holdings grew, did my happiness expanded in equal measure?


I don't have a quantitative measure for happiness, but I know with certainty that the larger bank account and the bigger house never translated to more (or less) happiness.


It took retirement for me to begin to understand (and appreciate) Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs. I needed to turn off the financial spigot of a regular paycheck and annual financial compensation to "get it" and to understand Maslow's work at a deeply personal level.


The money primarily addressed the lower levels of my hierarchy, particularly physiological needs and safety needs for myself and my family. But the correlation between more money and more happiness for me was less straightforward as I moved up the hierarchy.


Once the physiological and safety needs for myself and my family were fulfilled, the impact of incremental money and material possessions on my overall happiness flatlined.


As I transitioned into retirement, I had to make a significant "mental adjustment" related to our finances. Yes, we had planned well and had enough money for a long and happy retirement. But for 30+ years, by design, I had put money INTO the bank and investment accounts.


Now, with no regular paycheck coming into those same accounts, I had to, again by design, take money OUT of those same accounts. That was, at least for me, a major change that I had to wrap my brain around every month.


Along with the whole "in" becomes "out" financial mind trick, I (consciously?) examined the source(s) of my happiness. I started the search for the tagline of my own Mastercard "priceless" commercial. My own personal life sales negotiation. What would I give up?


It wasn't solely in material possessions. I still like "stuff," and I have not taken a vow of poverty. It was a matter of quantity and degree. I realized that we don't need the big house any longer. We downsized our home and made countless trips to Goodwill.


Less stuff and more time correlated directly with more happiness.


Daily hikes and quiet nights on the deck with my wife and Rigby. Visits (and regular!) talks with my boys. Vacation and visiting time with my extended family. Pickleball, drinks, and engaging conversations with my friends. Volunteer work helping others move their lives, incrementally, in a new direction. All pretty much low cost but as my Mastercard commercial says "Priceless."


Do have any regrets? I am sure I have a few (another article maybe?). But for this post, I will only say that I wish I had learned the lesson sooner about what really matters most in life.


Time is the only referee in this game. And with the love of family, exercise, a reasonable(?) diet, and friends, I am going to play this game for many more years to come.


Dan Troup is The Sunny Side of 57. He loves to reflect and write about life, family, career, and retirement. Check out more of his reflections on his blog site. Also, consider subscribing to The Sunny Side of 57. When not playing pickleball or hiking with Sue and Rigby, he writes a new post about twice a month.











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